You won't be able to fully come back to your original tone unless it is possible to sacrifice integration and revert
I can attest to this... because I remember what I was like when I was Ti l---. And I can feel the existential difference to me then and me now. In relation to my younger self, I am much more quick-and-dirty with my reasoning. Less perfectionistic, and therefore less refined. Sometimes when I find that "place" again, of pure Ti, I remember just how keen I can be, and how many more layers down I can penetrate the essentials of a topic.
there are some topics here relevant to some of my personal concerns that are generally left disappointed by the typology community, so I'll jump in. I want to preface by saying that I still have a long way to go in studying this system. I discovered vultology 3 months ago and was intrigued by how accurately the signals seem to reflect what I believe to be my cognitive functions and I appreciate the potential to account for alternate development paths, as mine most definitely is. I seem to be in the beta quadrant and have always typed as an INFJ 🙄 lol and so far vultology appears to reflect that as well (based on a review of video from before I was exposed to this content and general awareness of my behavior) although I display marked Pe in interaction that is otherwise largely absent in alone time due to strain and lack of natural focus.
I'll try to get to the point 😁 a lot clicked for me when I established a general understanding of energetics (the archetypal associations like king/queen etc. was very helpful btw). I could clearly see how each of the energetics emerged in my personality development and how much I've been struggling with Je. I really appreciate the paradigm that superimposes an alternate development path on the "natural" one because that juxtaposition is the first that really captures what's going on with my personality. I can see exactly why I veered away from conscious Je development by necessity in my home life. and yet, Fe has been this thing that I struggled in the shadow of, with the degree of influence it's unconscious power has had within me, my values, and disposition. I do very clearly display the energetics but I've resisted truly bringing it into myself as a comfortable part of my being, although I've made more progress recently. 10 years ago seems to mark the point at which I made the necessary step of taking the first conscious step towards it, out of a need to differentiate my sense of self within unintentionally abusive family dynamics. the consequences irl estranged me from my family and resulted in a catastrophic ego death that left me in a state of psychological shock for 6 years (no emotion, minimal cognitive processing, in a kind of perceptual haze). I actually knew it had been coming my whole life, within a deep sense of how my emotionally toxic developmental environment perpetually invalidated my ability to realize my needs as an individual, even after I moved away from home as an adult. anyhow, I've been recovering the last 4 years and was pleasantly surprised by the benefits of lifting the veil of dissonance from my cognition. there's been a lot of psychological damage to struggle through but I've gotten into typology as a roadmap to orient myself in the process of individuation and healing and so far this notion of embodied cognition has tremendous promise ☺️ imo.
ok, I have a few questions and please forgive the level of ignorance with which I may be asking, I usually can't stop myself from trying to jump ahead with personal implications when I should just focus on taking in new content 😆 I just get excited when something clicks in a way that later on I'll probably feel sheepish about. I can actually see how well this instinct fits with the CT section on Ni, which contains the most relatable content on Ni I've seen so far. I was wondering what you think of Ni Ti Se Fe as a pathway? once the functional paradigm of energetics sunk in, a conceptual timeline of emergence was undeniable. it also clarified the difference between unconscious and conscious functioning and made sense of some peculiarities within my personality, like how much more childlike I am now than when I was actually a child 😆 and thank god for that ☺️
anyway, I'm trying not to write a novel lol and I've gotten the basic question out ☺️ the other thing that intrigued me was the mention of IQ. when I was a child, I was administered the Stanford Binet and transferred to a school with a 145 IQ entrance requirement and last year (when I was 39) I took an online Mensa test and my results required extrapolation beyond the programmed scoring parameters, which I believe to have been 85-145. my point is that my IQ seems to consistently register in the range of extrapolation and I was wondering what, if any, impact this could have on a function stack like mine. I otherwise know myself to be a 549 sx/so with a major tendency to socially withdraw (I'm vulnerable to physiological overstimulation) and I tend to slip into a kind of Ni-Se perceptual loop as a coping mechanism. Pi Ji appears dominant in my basic functioning with active fulfilment and joy revolving around Pe, which is also central to my sense of self. Je seem to be the growth I'm actively working on integrating for greater balance and well-being and a more effective ability to assert myself and act meaningfully in the world with confidence and responsibility. thank you for your patience and consideration ☺️ and I really look forward to everything I have yet to learn from CT.
great... I just started thinking of myself as a Senex Princess 😂🤣🤦🏻♀️😏