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Bera
Moderator
  • Type: SeFi
  • Development: ll--
  • Attitude: Seelie

Hello, Aux !

I actually saw that image recently and loved it ! It reminds me of me and 3 of my friends. <3

Sadly, I don’t have a lot of time to spend with my friends, because I work a lot and my type of work also involves lots and lots of socializing, which is energy consuming. So, by trial and error I learned that the amount of energy I have is enough for one major free time – socializing event per week. I can do 2 of them now and then, but at a higher energetic cost.

So, a couple of the things I do to keep a good balance between friendship and alone time are :

– I consciously choose people who are independent and who have many interests to become my friends. This way, at every given time they have many other options beside seeing me (so, they will not become too pushy).

– I only go out with friends once or mostly twice / week;

– most of my socializing events are going out with one or a small group of close friends and/or playing DnD.

I highly suggest to try playing board games and pen and paper role playing games with a small group of people because this way you get to have a consistent socializing routine and an amount of time investment easier to manage.

My DnD group meets once or twice / month and we spend more or less of half a day together, playing. But playing DnD takes less energy and socializing than talking to someone for hours. And I started to explain why but this message has gotten a bit long, so I will detail it only if you would like to hear more about it. 🙂

Also, this type of socializing (like playing games together) makes people have a framework for the time they are spending together. If we know we meet up every second Saturday at 2 p.m. at our friend’s place to play a game…we will tend to keep those limits and not overstep them like other types of friends would. So, my friend will probably not call me Tuesday evening to ask me if she can drop by because she just happens to be close to my place, you know?? 🙂

Now…I do have friends I talk to on a daily basis. My best friend is pretty close to me emotionally and we talk about everything. But she is also very busy, so I only see her once/week. Again, we both have a clear idea about how often we will meet, it’s not like that situation in which your friend is also your neighbor and knocks on your door every time she has something to tell you. 🙂

So, I think building a bit of a routine in your social activities helps a lot. 🙂 Like…just make it clear you can see them once a week or twice/month or how often you feel like or find a framework like that of meeting up at gaming events or joining a club etc.

  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.
  • This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Bera.

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