Reply To: NiTe – Teal Swan & The Ego

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Elisa Day
Participant
  • Type: TiSe
  • Development: ll--
  • Attitude: Adaptive

Her videos are great. She’s so sultry! Her ego video is new to me today, but she basically summed up many of last year’s lessons of mine and covered all the bases. Ego is more than building up personal significance through pride, but also false modesty and tearing others down.

“An “F” ego will focus on their own characteristics as an ethical person, and repress their own moments of insensitivity and interpersonal neglect. A “T” ego person will see themselves as someone capable of making decisions unencumbered by the befuddling appendage that is the human heart, able to retain a level head in all situations. An “N” ego person will see themselves as a harbinger of unknown wisdom from the unconscious, deriving rapport and a sense of value from viewing themselves as such. An “S” ego person will see themselves as realistic, practical, not lost in la-la-land and therefore wiser than those who allow themselves to be swept away by the unseen.”

Based on this it would be difficult for me to relate to “F” ego because my identity is fixated on perceptions of lifelong relationship challenges, conflict, alienation, ostracization, and isolation. However, I’m beginning to realize that these ego perceptions have lead to an overcompensation in accommodation, self-sacrifice, and consideration.

There’s no way I would have ever ego identified with “T.” Perhaps this is a false modesty mask, but one thing I was always certain about is that I don’t make level-headed, logical decisions. Everyone around me made that abundantly clear. It’s possible that being female caused people to assume this about me and made me see it as an acceptable ego choice, but I also used to judge “T” people harshly for what I perceived as being heartless at the time.

As a kid I would have definitely chosen the “S” ego as my preferred identity. By the age of 5 I would argue with my religious peers against the idea of the existence of God Sam Harris style. Yet I would also wear worry doll pouches around my neck, make wishes upon them, and put them under my pillow at night to carry my wishes into my subconscious. My parents bought me pendulum crystals and Ouija boards, but this was just typical parent stuff that I had to rebel against. ISFP was the first type I ever chose for myself based on Kiersey temperaments because I thought the N descriptions sounded nerdy and pretentious. Later on I changed to N after being told my art was mystical and shamanistic. This came as a shock to me, but I began noticing this side of myself and synchronicities were happening everywhere. Celebrities were showing up in my dreams and sending me personal messages through lyrics that sent me on uniquely significant spiritual quests. Recently I realized this was all just ego, and the danger of art school is they use narcissistic supply to trap those most vulnerable to its seductive promises of fame. Now I think I bounce back and forth between “S” and “N” ego depending on the day, but I see the value in “N” more than ever and no longer think of it as nerdy parent stuff. In fact I see value in all of the functions and can see a place for them all within my ego, but without the help of typology that probably would have been more difficult.

  • This reply was modified 1 year, 9 months ago by Elisa Day.

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