Reply To: [Seelie] How do you deal with emotions?

Index Forums Ask a Demographic [Seelie] How do you deal with emotions? Reply To: [Seelie] How do you deal with emotions?

FiNe
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I don’t know if I am seelie/unseelie. I will propably throw some videos on discord soon. But I believe I am Fi user (at least in JCF standards). I struggle with similar pattern like you do. And I am on the road of long journey to emotional well-being.

Functions are domain of neocortex activity. I actually think the problem lie deeper than that, in deeper parts of the brain. Using functions is a part of the job that have to be done here but not the whole. Fi can give us deeper awerness of our condition and motivations to take care of ourselfs. But to change situation we need to take actions and consider the bigger picture, that means use of supporting extraverted function (Ne) I think.

You ask for a method. I know a few and I believe you also know a few methods to cope with emotions. Internet gives many many “problem-solution” advices. Some are more and some are less efficient but most of them fail to give us permanent or stable change. I believe this is becouse it’s not about method or skill in the first place but about build-in emotional resilience, and stress regulation mechanisms. There is neuropsychological rule to work from bottom to top of our nervous system.

“when a person has a calloused relationship to their own heart, and a closed channel to their own inner frailty.” I don’t think this is a healthy pattern for me because it tends to make me cold and without compassion. Since seelie people presumably don’t “close the channel to their inner frailty,” I’m wondering what they do instead.

They do nothing I think… They have order in processing information in lower parts of brain that’s why the ability to process emotions through higher cognitive functions stay open for them. The pattern you mantioned above comes from stress response reactions in lower parts of brain. There is chaos and in that situation higher/conscious lvl of thinking turn off or don’t work proply. When that is happening “the shadow” take us in possesion, our impulses start to dominate in our behaviours and the first function which falls victim to them is our inferior function. For Fi-lead(dom) this is Te and lens of that function is to make impartial decisions.

I think we need take a set of actions to addreess this issue. I am doing self-therapy becouse I didn’t find good therapist that I can afford. This is on going process. At least  internet gives us a lot of resources and strategies to be used.

Another thing I don’t mentioned yet are “schemas” which regulate our behaviours from uncosciousness and which people try to change on CBT theraphy. If we do something that harms us, but it is embedded in our behavior, it is most likely a schema. To change own schemas isn’t easy thing to do either. I think deep reflection on our cognitive functions (how we use them) helps here.

Sorry that I can’t give you direct advice but I wish that post could give you some insight on my view. I am open to discuss every matter and to hear your thoughts.

Take care of yourself. ^^

  • This reply was modified 5 months, 2 weeks ago by FiNe.
  • This reply was modified 5 months, 2 weeks ago by FiNe.
  • This reply was modified 5 months, 2 weeks ago by FiNe.

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