Reply To: “Art” is not related to Ji nor “Variety” to Pe.

Home Page Forums Cognitive Functions “Art” is not related to Ji nor “Variety” to Pe. Reply To: “Art” is not related to Ji nor “Variety” to Pe.

Animal
Participant
  • Type: SeFi
  • Development: lll-
  • Attitude: Unseelie

@LadyNerdsky

For me, expressing my inner experience through the arts is life or death. Period. I threw away my whole childhood happily – to practice scales, vocal exercises and writing. I took acting, dancing, singing and piano lessons and got 100% on NYSSMA state exams singing opera in other languages. My perfectionism was that extreme – even though I preferred broadway and rock to opera. I sang gigs every week and made money, and I had a pragmatic future plan. I saved up 10k by the time I was 15 and was recording my personal songs in NYC.  My original work always ended up concentrating on similar themes, which I now call ‘Erosia,’ my home planet.

It was nothing like “I considered maybe becoming a professional one day.” Never in my life have I felt this was a choice. I envy those who can pour their heart into a job that pays well and also contributes to the good of others. Because for me, anything less than ‘bringing Erosia to Earth’ would be death to my soul.

I got very sick at 16 and was left speaking in a whisper for the rest of my life. Nonetheless when I had a slightly healthier period, I sang lead through my whisper to front my band and recorded my first album. I cannot possibly explain how much sacrifice had to go into this. I spent every SECOND of my life maximizing my vocal potential through careful diets, exercise, vacuuming.. it was a science. I also managed, produced, promoted, taught everyone every part, auditioned people, booked, and did any practical thing I needed to uphold the shows. I wrote three full albums with concepts, stories, characters, meanings and details. Some songs came out perfect and others (most) I would refine extensively. It had to match, perfectly, the sentiment in my mind – regardless if that happened overnight or over decades.

I also wrote books in my early teens. Since I knew I couldn’t rely on doing music later on, I turned to writing. I was a horrible writer when it came to words; music was my second language – but I had intense and complex plots, characters and a universe that meant everything to me. So I dedicated my life to whipping myself into shape as a vessel through which they might emerge.

I’ve noticed a lot of the Ji people here, even those who are artists, see it as a hobby or a special talent that they can choose to pursue or not. “I decided to be a pro” sounds very practical but I never felt it was a decision.  Either I had to find some mediocre part time job so I could afford rent and still do my art , or I had to strive to make money doing my art. There was no other option.  (Aside from death.). Versatility, variety, open mindedness etc isn’t relatable in the slightest. I did not suffer so deeply from the loss of my voice just because I wanted to.  It’s because I have tunnel vision, obsession, and a need to complete these works. So when I read that Ji is the refined dedicated artist, and yet I see so many Ji leads doing art ‘on the side’ – I balk. Expressing Erosia was my life – long before I developed Ji – and I always will be.

I also agree with @Celeste. For Pe, fulfillment also does not have to come from the arts. I am just one example, and there are many other Pe leads like me that I can list off the top of my head. Trent Reznor, Jeff Martin, Jeff Beck, Lzzy Hale, etc — people who simply cannot see themselves living and breathing unless they do their music. But of course, many Pe leads find this same obsessive addictive single-minded fulfillment in other fields that aren’t artistic. And then, some just don’t work that way and prefer versatility. But versatility, open ended options & exploration should not be attributed to Pe, in my opinion. It’s more that in pursuing their interests, regardless how consistent or varied those may be, the Pe lead is a fast thinking opportunist.

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